Cyn's Path

[tennisbum]

Wow Cyn you look great and so happy. Congratulations to you!

[mainecyn]

I have newer pics, need to post some..not tonight. lol.

[princessdj]

wow. i havent looked in here before and i'm sooo glad i did. you are doing an amazing job. i find before and after pics so motivating. it reinforces what i'm doing and makes me believe that i can be a success too. thanks for posting those! wow.

[mainecyn]

thanks.

[mainecyn]

Adding new pic-this was me in Oct.

[Charmaine]

All I can say is you look amazing! You have really following the journey well and you have earned every ounce of success. Now enjoy it, embrace it and now that you are a success story...you have made it to a place where so many of us wish to be...thanks for sharing.

[mainecyn]

aww..thank you Char. I really don't look any different now than i did in the last pics. Its been a while since i looked at these, along with the before. I try to remind myself just how far I have come and am holding my own weight wise.

[mainecyn]

I was reflecting this morning in the shower. While i have not lost weight, it has been a couple months since my decision to just maintain over the winter. I still may not "like" so much as to what i see in the shower, generally besides a roll that comes up (muffin top) outta my jeans and shows in my sweaters, I am not to unhappy with how i look with clothes on. I have noticed that the extreme down or unhappy moods are gone. i know longer feel the pressure and i am learning to just be ok with things. I generally eat almost induction style. I have not introduced any grains etc. into my diet.

What i have done is once in a while i will have some fruit, or a lc ic cream bar. I don't feel the guilt. It has helped me a lot!~ I am thinking that this spring i will get back more to eating and trying to lose, but that this was the right decision for me and i was afraid I'd fall off the wagon totally when you add the down feeling i get in the winter.

Of course I'm not happy looking at myself in the shower. Yet, I am coming to terms with what i see. Also, during this time, I am slowly learning what i didn't the first time around..how to stay the size i am, how to control and face those emotions that make me run to food, scared, mad, anything. I still want and wish for more ab area loss, but too many ab surgeries being cut hip to hip, i have to be practical with what i expect .I would like to start losing again in the spring. But, at least I have not had the carb creep.

[reader]

Cyn, those are SUCH positive thoughts! I'm so glad you took some time to "smell the roses." This Spring we ALL will have a new resolve to do just a "little more." Remember, you have ALREADY achieved your goal! The rest is "gravy!"

Hey, my friend, how do you post pictures from your hard drive to ASG "before and after?" I seem to have lost my memory here!

I found a pic I just HAVE to post as a before...it is SO depressing when I look at it now, compared to my current "after" I hope it gives another a lift to see how little 35 pounds can make...and motivate them.

No matter what I try, it fails. I changed my "avatar photo" but that's all I know how to do. I have a "photobucket" account but for whatever reason, that did NOT work for me.

Toni

[deafheaven]

Originally Posted by mainecyn

What i have done is once in a while i will have some fruit, or a lc ic cream bar. I don't feel the guilt. It has helped me a lot!~ I am thinking that this spring i will get back more to eating and trying to lose, but that this was the right decision for me and i was afraid I'd fall off the wagon totally when you add the down feeling i get in the winter.

So hon, I want you to really reflect on this in regards to what has transpired lately. I want you to understand that I've been where you are. I know you feel like you let yourself down and probably that you feel like you have no will power.

But that's not the case. There are chemical reactions going on. Introducing the things you did affects your liver, your insulin, your blood sugar, and your seratonin. Don't you see Cyn... it's not you at all. It's just how our bodies work. The ice cream is just a bad idea period, even if it is the no sugar kind. The fruit is ok, but you have to be careful. Don't for example, have an entire apple all at once. And, did you know if you have something like a piece of cheese with that slice of apple, it will have a less of an immediate impact on your blood sugar.

Originally Posted by mainecyn

Of course I'm not happy looking at myself in the shower. Yet, I am coming to terms with what i see. Also, during this time, I am slowly learning what i didn't the first time around..how to stay the size i am, how to control and face those emotions that make me run to food, scared, mad, anything. I still want and wish for more ab area loss, but too many ab surgeries being cut hip to hip, i have to be practical with what i expect .I would like to start losing again in the spring. But, at least I have not had the carb creep.

I know these feelings all too well. I want you to prepare yourself however for the possibility that even once you've achieved your ideal weight, you will still have feelings of inadequacy and doubts about yourself. It's just human nature. And it's ok. When I went from over 400 lbs to 185 lbs, I still didn't see myself as "normal". I was wearing a size small in some clothes. Hard to believe. But the fat guy was always inside. Will always be inside. The psychological damage I've done to myself over 48 years has been tremendous. The weight is one thing. I know how hard that is but I can crunch the numbers face it almost like a bully in the playground. The mental stuff though. Well... I don't know. It's hard. Harder even than losing 225 lbs.

I believe in you Cyn. Don't give up. And don't wait to take control again.